Children adapt to change better than adults. Elucidate by comparing the behaviours of Wanda and her father to the treatment meted out to them in their town.
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Dena and I are both school counselors, but she felt ill-equipped to help her own son. “I feel like the worst mother ever,” she told me.
Parents often blame themselves for their child’s misbehavior, said Katherine Reynolds Lewis, the author of “The Good News About Bad Behavior.” “This idea that kids’ behavior is a reflection on the parent creates such a fear-based parenting culture, but all kids mess up. It’s part of learning self-control and how to behave in a given situation.”
According to recent research, a child who lashes out may not even be acting with intentionality, said psychologist Mona Delahooke, the author of “Beyond Behaviors: Using Brain Science and Compassion to Understand and Solve Children’s Behavioral Challenges.” She explained that many challenging behaviors are subconscious, involuntary and occur when a child inaccurately perceives threat. She urges adults to view kids with challenging behaviors as individuals with vulnerable nervous systems, not “problem children.”