dialogue between child and parent about their younger days
Answers
Child: Can I have this?
Me: No.
Child: Ah, perhaps I’ve miscommunicated. I’m asking for it because I want it.
Me: I understood that, actually.
Child: I think maybe you’re not hearing me. I’d like it because I want it.
Me: I’ve heard you quite well, I’m saying that’s not actually an argument.
Child: PERHAPS IF I SAID IT LOUDER.
Me: There’s no problem with my hearing. The problem is that your argument is, as the Romans would say, circulus in probando.
Child: Well then, let me offer this new information: I want it.
Me: That’s the same information. That’s what you just said, and it’s also the information I assumed when we started.
Child: Well, can I watch YouTube?
Me: You also can’t watch YouTube.
Child: If I can’t watch YouTube, then can I have it?
Me: No! Sorry. No. Why would you think you can have it now?
Child: What if I ask more politely?
Me: I support your decision to behave more politely, and it might increase your chances of getting the next thing you want, but it won’t affect your access to this thing now.
Child: Can I have part of it?
Me: No. No, the having of it is what I’m saying no to. Having part of it is the same as having it.
Child: So can I have all of it?
Me: No! I’m answering the same question. The answer is no.
Child: Why not?
Me: BECAUSE I—Look. No.
Child: But, OK, look, here is some new information.
Me: Yes. What is it?
Child: I need it.