experience of old person about their school life
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At the start of the year I knew nobody. Slowly I started barely talking to people in my classes. I could never sum up enough energy or might to talk to people or keep a conversation. I felt anxious everyday.
When I started to sit with people I didn’t say a word. I would get embarrassed by myself, and thought that nobody liked me. So I would stop sitting with them.
I absolutely hated lunch and break because I had nobody to sit with. I would get embarrassed and feel humiliated if someone I met saw me sitting alone. So for 30 minutes I would walk around my high school campus three or four times. Just so people thought I had somewhere to be.
This lasted for months.
Occasionally I would sit with one or two people but it never lasted for long and soon I would find myself walking around again.
Towards the end of the first semester I became more comfortable talking to certain people in my classes. However these conversations never went anywhere. I rarely got anyone's phone number, and the only time I did was when someone wanted the homework.
At one point I thought the only reason people were talking with me was because I was smart and they wanted to use me for a better grade.
That’s how the entire year went. Not once did I ever truly hang out with people from my school. And the only time I hung out with people was with old friends and that was only once in a while.
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