express your views when we are feeling bad we tend to take it out on ourselves
Answers
Explanation:
Feeling bad about oneself is a common response to realising that one has acted wrongly, or that one could have done something morally better. It is a reaction that is at least partly inspired by a cultural background that Western civilisation has been carrying on its back for centuries. But contrary to appearances and folk beliefs, not only does our tendency to feel guilty fail to promote morality, it can also be an obstacle to moral behaviour.
By ‘guilt’, I mean a negative affective state usually experienced as a result of having done something (by action or omission) that is perceived to be wrong, and that is focused on the condemnation of oneself.[1]
I can think of at least seven reasons for why feeling bad about oneself is not useful or desirable for the purposes of leading an ethical life:
1. Feeling guilty is not necessary for leading an ethical life. In other words, it seems to be perfectly possible to have a very ethical life without having to feel guilty when errors or mistakes are made. How one feels about oneself seems superfluous, as long as one tries to remedy the wrongs committed and changes one’s behaviours for future occasions.
2. Feeling bad about oneself is not sufficient for leading an ethical life. That is, one may feel guilty about something and continue to act immorally. A person may feel terrible every time she does something wrong (e.g., cheat on her spouse) and yet continue to engage in the same behaviour.
3. Feeling bad about oneself is a selfish response. When we feel guilty we think of ourselves as unworthy, we are not at peace with ourselves. But these kinds of thoughts are fundamentally self-centred, while arguably, morality relies above all on thinking of others. Guilt distracts us from being of benefit to others. We are so worried about what awful people we are that we forget about what we could be doing for those around us (including the possible victims of our moral fault). Indeed, empirical evidence suggests that such self-focus interferes with having empathic responses towards others (Tangney and Dearing 2002). While people who feel bad about their actions and the effects of their actions tend to look for ways to remedy the wrongs they have committed, people who feel bad about themselves are more likely to fall into self-destructive behaviours (idem).