Growing with single parent eassy
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Growing up with a single parent is special, but it's not easy. If I've learned anything throughout my 23 years on this planet, it's that a single parent will do anything it takes to make you happy and give you the best possible life they can. But doing any major task alone is stressful and difficult; you'll have your rough patches that are unique to a single parent household. However, that doesn't mean growing up with a single parent is any worse than growing up with any other type of family. In fact, from my experience, it may even be better.
A single parent is often not home
I grew up the only daughter of a single mother, so it really was a unique, one-on-one relationship. (Yes, I love Gilmore Girls.) As I got older, I always knew I could go directly to her for any advice on any topic, from struggling friendships to sex. Nothing was off limits. But because she worked long hours to be able to provide for me, she didn't have the time or energy to do things that the average parent would do when I was younger. She wasn't able to take me to school in the mornings, she wasn't able to play much with me after grueling work weeks, and we never once sat down at the same table for a home-cooked meal.
To a person who grew up in a two-parent household with a bunch of siblings, this may seem pretty sad. And I'm not going to lie, parts of it did make me sad, especially when I compared my home life to other kids'. But not getting to see my mom all the time was also my "normal." Every family is different and has a different daily routine. When you're the child of a single parent, you get used to the fact that they can't always be there. But the best part of my day was always when she came home from work at seven o'clock and I could finally see her and hug her and jump on her. It made me deeply appreciate the moments we did have together, and it made them more precious to me.
Other people play a huge part in raising you
Since my mother couldn't always be there, the people who did do the usual parental activities with me were my aunt and my grandfather. My grandfather took me to and picked me up from school and made me all kinds of food special to our Armenian background. My aunt was a flight attendant, so on the weeks she was home and not in the skies, she would read to me (which ended up being the reason I fell in love with writing) and play made-up games. While my relationship with my mother was special to me because it was just the two of us as parent and child, it was my grandfather who gave me the comfort of home and my aunt who instilled in me a sense of wonder.
A single parent just has to work, work, work — there's no way around it. So while you sometimes miss out on spending time with your parent, you also get to grow up with a network of people around you who chip in and care about you. It wasn't only my grandfather and aunt who watched me and raised me; it was babysitters, too. To this day, I'm still good family friends with my favorite babysitter, who now has a husband and two kids. As an only child of a single parent, I got to branch out and keep lasting relationships with others, even if I didn't have the luxury of spending more time with my mom.
You sometimes doubt how much your parent cares
Like I said before, being the only child of a single parent isn't easy. They're gone a lot, and when you move along into your teen years and don't need to be under constant watch all the time, you can get very lonely. When I was a teen, I had my close group of friends that, to me, was my family. However, since my mom was always working and tired when she came home, I felt very isolated and distanced from her. No one's teenage years are easy — frankly, they suck. For me, though, teen angst and turbulent emotions were amplified because I often felt like my mom didn't care. I translated her absence and lack of communication into apathy, which really troubled me for a long time.
As an adult, I know now that she was far from apathetic as she worked relentlessly to provide me with anything I wanted. No family, no matter how many people it is composed of, is ever 100 percent happy 100 percent of the time. The kind of unhappiness I dealt with was particular to a single parent home, but other kids have their own kind of unhappiness with their home life, too.