Life in a wheelchair summary
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ccepting I needed to use a wheelchair was a big obstacle to overcome. Not only was I coping with physical changes courtesy of the MS but I also had to make a psychological shift that was just as hard, if not harder. There is the inevitable question “why me?” (to which the answer is “why not?”) and a growing sense of frustration. In the end I had a choice – take to my sofa and never go anywhere or use a wheelchair and get on with life. I opted for the latter but it certainly wasn’t easy. Sadly, there are many people who can’t bring themselves to use a wheelchair and miss out on the rest of their lives. As far as I am concerned, my wheelchair has become my legs but that doesn’t mean life is as it was before. Nothing like it.
People react differently to someone in a wheelchair. There is a general assumption that if you can’t walk you can’t think. People really do talk to the person I’m with or adopt a patronising tone as if I can’t understand. People also stare. I always smile at them, even if it resembles a rictus grin. Their reaction is then either to smile back or look away. Sadly, there are some people who are embarrassed by those of us who have to use a wheelchair. Not so children, who always smile; they simply don’t have a problem with wheelies and many is the time a young child has struck up a conversation with me, wanting to know why I am in a ‘pushchair’.
I had always been very independent so it was hard for me to accept help; these days I am very grateful if it is offered. I cannot work. I cannot go anywhere on my own. I can no longer drive, nor can I put my own wheelchair into the boot of a car. Wherever I go I have to check the access and whether there is a disabled toilet. Even after checking such things there can always be an unplanned for hazard just waiting to catch me out: perhaps there is a door that is too heavy for me to open or a ramp to be negotiated (and ramps are always steeper than they look…). John and I realised many years ago that spur of the moment trips can no longer happen. Our key to a successful trip of any kind is planning, planning and more planning
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