parents are more often than not a hindrane to the progress of their child and a thorn in the achievement of their dreams.ecpress your opinion in 400 words
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Often I end up asking myself the same question again and again. “Should I pursue my dreams or should I fulfil my parents’?”
As our culture teaches us, parents are the only living gods and making them happy is our prime duty. And yes, we all do respect and love our parents. But when it comes to career and setting our future goals, a fine line of separation can be observed between thoughts. Though in many cases where the parents are well educated and liberal, they allow their children to pursue their own dreams without much ado.
But unfortunately these cases are very less in number. The other form of parenting is a common case in India. Anyone can experience these conflicts arising in every middle-class family. The story always starts with parents’ dream but the child’s dream sometimes completely different. There comes then the difference in the mind-sets and the argument ends with uncomfortable situations. Somewhere we are all aware of this.
But the point is, why does this happen? And why is not it so easy to avoid? Responding to the situation, my friend, Mridang Lodha says,‘The conflicts arise where parents do not trust or have less faith on the independence of the child’s thinking process and also how well can he manage things. So I think from day one, if you show yourself as a confident and articulate decision maker, the growing confidence of your parents will pay in future. Also our generation only knows less of talking and more of arguing. It would be better if we could discuss things with our parents but not debate. However, the parents should also be open to ideas.’’
Let’s have a close look at what actually happens. I personally believe that the level of education, narrow outlook and immature decisions are the major factors that affect such a scenario. Sometimes, we feel parents are not well educated and are not able to understand the real desires and potential that the child has. Here, parents may lack the knowledge of current trends, market demands, different future aspects and a little courage too. But they feel that it is their child who wants to take unnecessary risk and trouble by pursuing his own goals. They always force their child to play safe and get in to a common easy life, far away from risks and tensions. We all know that the parents all mean to see their kids happy and around, and that should be discounted in our arguments. But if all will play safe without taking risks and overcoming failures then the evolution will definitely be at stake. So, should a child stomp upon his/her own dreams?
There are few cases where parents completely live in their children’s dreams and forget the essence of reality. Sometimes parents forge their failed dreams or goals in the impressionable minds of their children. The father who wanted to be a doctor wants his son to be a doctor and the mother who wanted to be an actress wants her daughter to be a super model. Like this many parents, deliberately or sub-consciously, have been remoulding the naïve thoughts. Addressing the issue, Dr. Marks, who has been working as a psychiatrist and psychotherapist from Atlanta says, ‘‘allow your child the important lessons of disappointment and failure. Finding out for themselves whether they have the ability and skill to realize their dreams helps children to refine and restructure their dreams into attainable goals. ’’