People who think about other people's feelings are caring.
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Answer:
I think maybe there was more to this question before as the answers i see below seem to refer to things I don't see in the text above.
But, the best shrink i ever knew said, "its a problem if it gets in the way of your being happy." If it IS getting in your way, either damaging relationships you value, or making you feel that there is something missing in your life, you probably want to consult with a professional.
I can say it is not "normal" not to care for other people's feelings. We all have what is referred to as a"moral circle", and area around us we care for and sympathize with. For some people the moral circle is wider then others, but it should at least extend to your closest relationships.
But, the best shrink i ever knew said, "its a problem if it gets in the way of your being happy." If it IS getting in your way, either damaging relationships you value, or making you feel that there is something missing in your life, you probably want to consult with a professional.
I can say it is not "normal" not to care for other people's feelings. We all have what is referred to as a"moral circle", and area around us we care for and sympathize with. For some people the moral circle is wider then others, but it should at least extend to your closest relationships.
There is some evidence that this is built into the function of our brains:
Answer:
If your immediate thought was: “What do you mean, who could ignore that, it’s unbearable when someone who matters to me is unhappy with me?”, then you’re going to want to keep reading.
I always teach that the first step in emotional adulthood is not blaming other people for your feelings. Your feelings are created by your thoughts, and other people don’t cause or control them.
But by the same token, you do not create other people’s though.
Or sometimes you say or do one thing, and two people interpret it two totally different ways. That’s because their thoughts are different.
It doesn’t matter if someone tells you that you create their feelings. If someone had cancer and told you that you created it in their body, you wouldn’t believe them. You don’t control their cell division, and you don’t control their thoughts.
After all, we are taught growing up that caring about someone means you make them have good feelings. It’s completely baked into the emotional model we are taught. And we’re even taught that people who don’t change their behavior based on what other people think and feel are bad people.
But, here’s the mind-blowing part: Believing you cause other people’s feelings does not make you a kinder, nicer person.
It makes you way less kind to yourself and others. When you believe you cause someone else’s feelings, that means you can’t feel ok about yourself unless they think and feel the way you want them to. And THAT means you immediately become totally enmeshed in trying to control and manage their feelings. So you start resenting that they are upset with you, and you get invested in them changing those thoughts and feelings so you can stop feeling bad about yourself. It just becomes a shell game, where you’re both trying to change the other so you can feel better.
True kindness is when you can have compassion for someone else’s suffering, even if you know their thoughts are creating it. It’s when you take responsibility for yourself, but not for them, and when you allow them to think and feel however they want, without making it mean anything about yourself.
Explanation:
hope!it's helps