Q. 5. Sometimes excessive love and care
could be dangerous Discuss in the light
of your reading the text. (100-120 words)
Answers
Answer:
Explanation:
I love you much too much, I've known it from the start, but yet my love is such, I can't control my heart" —Alma Cogann
"Too much of a good thing is wonderful." —Mae West
Love is morally desirable as it entails profound care for another person. It is hard to see how such positive care can be criticized. Nevertheless, people do criticize lovers and especially those whose love appears to be excessive. Can one tell one's beloved that he loves her too much?
Romantic love is described in idealistic terms as something huge, uncompromising, and without limitations. Statements like "The world has changed, everything is different now," "Loving him is wonderful; my whole being expands into unprecedented realms," "I am surrounded by nothing but you" are common among lovers. If "All you need is love," and "You are everything I need," then it is difficult to see how love can be criticized as being excessive.
There is indeed a view claiming that, unlike other emotions, love cannot be criticized since it consists of disinterested care for the beloved, which involves promoting only her well-being. According to this view, the value of love is not determined, or at least not entirely determined, by its practical value as a means to achieve certain ends of the lover's; rather, it focuses upon the well-being of the beloved. Accordingly, we would not usually criticize a person who is deeply and happily in love with someone just because we think he could have found a better partner.
However, even if love were concerned solely with disinterested care for the beloved (and this is not obviously so), there is still the question of what constitutes proper caring. Love is not a merely theoretical attitude; it has profound behavioral implications for our life. And if such behavior becomes improper, then the issue of whether one can love too much might arise (contrary to the above view).
Emotions might be harmful when they are excessive. Emotional excess is harmful for the same reasons that other kinds of excess are harmful. As in other emotions, excessiveness in love can impede the lover from seeing a broader perspective. Even normal cases of romantic love tend to create a narrow temporal perspective that focuses on the beloved and is often oblivious to other considerations. Accordingly, it has been argued that it is impossible to love and be wise and that the true opposite of love is justice. Little wonder then that, as Stevie Wonder puts it, "All in love is fair."
Although it is difficult to define what constitutes excessiveness in love, characterizing love as "too much" implies that some damage has been done—either to the lover or the beloved. When intense love blinds our sight and makes us act improperly, people may say that such intense love is too much. A remark such as, "I couldn't help it, I was madly in love with her," indicates that sometimes love can be excessive.
Loving too much can be problematic when it hurts the lover, which typically occurs in the long term. The lover's intense love might be excessive in the sense that it prevents her from realizing the true nature of their relationship. For example, her intense love might prevent her from noticing, or at least admitting, that his attitude toward her is humiliating or that their relationship has very little chance of surviving in the long term. Hence, contrary to the claim cited above, it is possible to criticize someone's intense love on the grounds that such intensity prevents him from seeing his partner's faults or from recognizing that he could choose another partner who might make him happier and more satisfied in the longer run. For this reason, classical art often depicts the god of love, Cupid, as blind, indicating that lovers are blind to the faults or the unsuitability of the one they love.