Read my story please and review it take notes please it is called harry potter and Lord voldemort's return
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It's a wonderful story. I love how you included all the characters. Also, if Draco's wife has no role here, you can just erase her presence, or give her some dialogues. I'd advise you to improve on your descriptions. All in all, your story is going in a good direction. If possible, you should lengthen the Voldemort scene. Show some action.
I'm a published writer and poet. Ask me anytime.
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