what is the need of making friends
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10 reasons why you need to make friends:
Friendfluence affects you in more ways than you realize. Flora made up the word "friendfluence" to capture the effect that friends have on our lives: “Friendfluence is the powerful and often unappreciated role that friends—past and present—play in determining our sense of self and the direction of our lives” (p. 6). Whether you realize it or not, your friends have shaped who you are today. You are even the product of the friends who are no longer your friends.
Friends can give you vital life skills. Friendfluence gives you vital life skills; “the very abilities one generally needs to be successful in life” (p. 6). There are many perks of friendship include sharpening your mind, making you generally happier, knowing yourself better, becoming inspired to reach your goals, advancing your career, helping you meet romantic partners, and living a longer and healthier life.
Childhood friendships start your learning process. Early friendships play a vital role because they occur while key developmental changes are taking place. They help teach us some of those important life skills but also shape our life “narrative.” Flora advocates for parents and teachers to give kids unstructured time to work out their own social relationships rather than to over-program them into restrictive activities.
Teen friendships shape your later romantic bonds. Though parents spend much of their time worrying about who their teenage kids are with, these relationships are a training ground for the later long-term bonds that will evolve through adulthood. Flora advises parents to recognize that peers will “trump” them every time, and so instead of fighting with your kids about spending too much time with their friends, or who their friends are, you can help your children more by inviting their friends over to your home.
Friends can help you define your priorities. People tend to pick friends who are similar to them. This fact falls under the general proximity rule of close relationships, in that like tends to attract like. Because we fall prey so easily into this similarity trap, it is important to try to stretch yourself to learn from some of those opposites. Flora points out the many ways in which “Birds, feather, flock.” Knowing this can help you grow by expanding your range of friends and trying out some new points of view.
Having friends can help you get more friends. People tend to like others who have a reputation for being nice and helpful, and they like people who like them. If you want to be the type of person who attracts new friends, these qualities will help get you on your way toward building your social group. Once you have more friends, you’ll be able to enjoy some of those perks of friendship.
Close friends support you through thick and thin. To take the most advantage of friendfluence, put effort into your closest friendships. Although being friendly can get you more friends, you don’t need hundreds to help you through life. You may have to prune your friendship tree as you get older to be sure that you give enough attention to the ones who will really matter for your well-being.
Friends can make you miserable too.There is a dark side to friendship. The people who know you the best are also the ones who have the most power to betray you, should the relationship sour. Friends can also get you into trouble. If your friends are doing something bad or harmful, you tend to be more likely to do so as well, a fact to which many drinkingbuddies can certainly attest. Friends can also cause you stress when they get in the way of other important goals or relationships. Be ready to say no to friends who disappoint, betray, or stress you and you’ll be more likely to get the full friendfluence effect.
You’re less lonely when you have friends. The worst kind of friendfluence, according to Flora, is a complete lack of friends. Loneliness is painful, especially when you are living with loneliness for a prolonged period of time. This is yet another reason to put time, energy, and attention into finding and cultivating a close circle of friends.
Your online friends can steer your thoughts and behaviors. Although online friends are qualitatively different than your in-person friends, they shape you nevertheless. They can also be your source of life support. Flora shows us how Toni Bernhard, author of How to be Sick(link is external), and confined to her home, has maintained a lifeline to the outside world through her closest online friends. Of course, your online friends can also make you miserable too, especially if you get caught in the “friendship paradox” (the fact that most people on Facebook have fewer friends than the average number). If you can avoid having Facebook envydominate your life, you’ll have more rewarding connections with your extended friendship community.
Friendfluence affects you in more ways than you realize. Flora made up the word "friendfluence" to capture the effect that friends have on our lives: “Friendfluence is the powerful and often unappreciated role that friends—past and present—play in determining our sense of self and the direction of our lives” (p. 6). Whether you realize it or not, your friends have shaped who you are today. You are even the product of the friends who are no longer your friends.
Friends can give you vital life skills. Friendfluence gives you vital life skills; “the very abilities one generally needs to be successful in life” (p. 6). There are many perks of friendship include sharpening your mind, making you generally happier, knowing yourself better, becoming inspired to reach your goals, advancing your career, helping you meet romantic partners, and living a longer and healthier life.
Childhood friendships start your learning process. Early friendships play a vital role because they occur while key developmental changes are taking place. They help teach us some of those important life skills but also shape our life “narrative.” Flora advocates for parents and teachers to give kids unstructured time to work out their own social relationships rather than to over-program them into restrictive activities.
Teen friendships shape your later romantic bonds. Though parents spend much of their time worrying about who their teenage kids are with, these relationships are a training ground for the later long-term bonds that will evolve through adulthood. Flora advises parents to recognize that peers will “trump” them every time, and so instead of fighting with your kids about spending too much time with their friends, or who their friends are, you can help your children more by inviting their friends over to your home.
Friends can help you define your priorities. People tend to pick friends who are similar to them. This fact falls under the general proximity rule of close relationships, in that like tends to attract like. Because we fall prey so easily into this similarity trap, it is important to try to stretch yourself to learn from some of those opposites. Flora points out the many ways in which “Birds, feather, flock.” Knowing this can help you grow by expanding your range of friends and trying out some new points of view.
Having friends can help you get more friends. People tend to like others who have a reputation for being nice and helpful, and they like people who like them. If you want to be the type of person who attracts new friends, these qualities will help get you on your way toward building your social group. Once you have more friends, you’ll be able to enjoy some of those perks of friendship.
Close friends support you through thick and thin. To take the most advantage of friendfluence, put effort into your closest friendships. Although being friendly can get you more friends, you don’t need hundreds to help you through life. You may have to prune your friendship tree as you get older to be sure that you give enough attention to the ones who will really matter for your well-being.
Friends can make you miserable too.There is a dark side to friendship. The people who know you the best are also the ones who have the most power to betray you, should the relationship sour. Friends can also get you into trouble. If your friends are doing something bad or harmful, you tend to be more likely to do so as well, a fact to which many drinkingbuddies can certainly attest. Friends can also cause you stress when they get in the way of other important goals or relationships. Be ready to say no to friends who disappoint, betray, or stress you and you’ll be more likely to get the full friendfluence effect.
You’re less lonely when you have friends. The worst kind of friendfluence, according to Flora, is a complete lack of friends. Loneliness is painful, especially when you are living with loneliness for a prolonged period of time. This is yet another reason to put time, energy, and attention into finding and cultivating a close circle of friends.
Your online friends can steer your thoughts and behaviors. Although online friends are qualitatively different than your in-person friends, they shape you nevertheless. They can also be your source of life support. Flora shows us how Toni Bernhard, author of How to be Sick(link is external), and confined to her home, has maintained a lifeline to the outside world through her closest online friends. Of course, your online friends can also make you miserable too, especially if you get caught in the “friendship paradox” (the fact that most people on Facebook have fewer friends than the average number). If you can avoid having Facebook envydominate your life, you’ll have more rewarding connections with your extended friendship community.
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