Write paragraph on a shopping is fun with friends
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Shopping malls are considered to be good places to go with friends and families to enjoy free time together. It may be true in the past but is shouldn't be true anymore in this present era because people have many options other than malls and it can be more expensive going to malls compare to visit other attractions.
Shopping malls have been being enjoyable place to go with families and to meet friends because they provide places with many preferable options, like shopping experiences, food courts, entertainments, retail stores, and some open spaces that can be used for visitors. Since malls have already existed many years, people nowadays try to find another option that will make them feel difference experiences. Cafés, restaurants, and destination places have been increasing popularisation not only by millennial but also elderly people to meet their relatives and enjoy free time together. These places are usually more convenience for people because closer to the nature and sometime create memorable moment with they lovely people.
Another reason people become less interest with shopping malls is because the expenditure that they must spend in that places are quite expensive to other options. Malls are created as shopping centers for people to spent their money to buy some products or services. Meeting with friends in malls is expensive because food centers in malls set higher tariff than cafés or restaurants.
In conclusion, people prefer to change their habit from going to malls at the weekend to other destinations because these places are more expensive and old-fashion place to enjoy free-time with others.
Maria - / 1,099 389 Oct 14, 2019 #2
@fach1910
Hello! Welcome to the forum! Hopefully, you like what you have been reading around here. I'm going to work and provide you with feedback on this writing.
Firstly, the first sentence of the initial paragraph is alright. The problem arose in the second sentences onward. You already had a cluster of a sentence that should have been reduced into its core and separated into two different lines. When you find yourself writing excessively, always take a step back and reassess your writing.
Furthermore, there's a severe imbalance in the bulk of the body of your writing. The second and third paragraphs, specifically, need to be catered and designated a little bit more to ensure that you are not merely writing without intention. Notice how, in the second paragraph, you were able to explain utterly what the central message of the text is, whereas the third paragraph is left hanging. Avoid this imbalance as it can be a distressful thing to witness in writing.
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