Question

How to deal with someone else insecurities?

Answer 1

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How to Deal With an
Insecure Person
Dealing with someone who is insecure
involves being kind, respectful, and
reassuring. Insecure people may have low
self-esteem or feel hurt by past experiences.
By providing them with support, you can
help them focus on the positive and boost
their self-esteem. Avoid feeling stressed
yourself by setting boundaries and guiding
them to find support in their community.
Method One of Four:
Setting Clear Boundaries
Create boundaries of interaction.
People who struggle with insecurity
may need constant reassurance and
support, which you can't always provide.
Talk with them about boundaries so
that you don't feel overwhelmed or
frustrated by their behavior.
For example, if you're in a
relationship with someone who's
insecure, they may want to know
what you're doing and where you
are. While it's important to check
in with them via phone or text, talk
with them ahead of time about
boundaries when you're out or
away from them. Stick to what you
both agree to do.
Perhaps you have a co-worker or
classmate who seems to need your
constant attention. Define good
times to talk and interact with
them. Consider saying things like,
"I want to be available for you, but
I also have some work to do. Why
don't we talk after class or at
lunch?"
Help to redirect their insecurity to
something positive. Insecure people
are often anxious about something or
someone. Maybe they have been hurt by
old boyfriends. Maybe they've been
bullied about the way they look. Help to
reduce their anxiety and focus on
positive thoughts.
Act as a reminder when they seem
to be focusing on the negative, and
try to redirect their thoughts to
positive things. For example, "I
know those people can be mean,
but remember that you have my
support, and the support of your
friends."
If the conversation appears fixated
on the negative, refocus the
conversation on something positive
that you see in them or neutral
topic of conversation. Consider
complimenting them for
something. Or discuss topics of
mutual interests such as movies,
sports, or other activities.
Avoid spending too much time on
emotionally draining people.
Insecure people can be emotionally
draining, and seem to make you feel
more tired afterwards. They may act
dependent on you for all their needs.
Avoid feeling like their caretaker, and
set boundaries. [1]
Motivate them to find ways to
cope without you always there.
Set specific times when you'll talk
and meet. Instead of avoiding
them completing, make sure to set
times that work for you and them.
Be clear and polite that you need
to have some space, but that
doesn't mean you don't care for
them. Explain to them how
personal space or time away from
each other can be healthy at times.
Remind them that you can't be
solely responsible for making them
feel better. That's too much for
one person. Not only is that
emotionally exhausting, but you
may inadvertently enable them to
depend on you 24/7.