Question

I know that I would never have done such things , and I was very much afraid to die, and often lay in bed at night by myself afraid to die and wondering how I would be when I went back to the front.  How does it proves in the story in another country the theme of cristim or lost

Answer 1

what is that
............

Answer 2

this shows that the victim of such circumstances is offendly willing to die.
the reasions may be unexplainably multiple.but situations prone to overcome fear and victims end up self harming leading to unprobable deaths.